Modesty forbids

If you're anything like me you'll agree that the body is a vile tempting sinful thing that needs to be covered up - lest the sight of an uncovered navel tips me into the brutal violent rape spree that lingers within every god fearing man.

If it wasn't for the big fella watching over me constantly there's no tellin' what shenanigans I'd be up to, but sometimes we need a little help - which is why Wholesomewear.com is a real godsend for all the ladies out there who'd like to go swimming, but understand that it's their duty to cover up at all times.

Jesus Loves You

But his dad thinks you're a shit.

Don't blame me, I voted for Darwin

As a resident and native of Louisville, KY, I have been authorized by a group of open-minded Louisvillians, including several non-fundamentalist Christians, to disavow any connection between our city and Kentucky's Creation Museum. The museum, which claims that man rode dinosaurs ala Barney Rubble, is in the northern Kentucky town of Petersburg (heh heh - Peter).

Petersburg, KY is located in the greater Cincinnati, Ohio area. It's a suburb of the Natty, a notoriously conservative town where law enforcement personnel are encouraged to shoot minorities on sight. Well, maybe not encouraged, but it has happened more than once.

The city of Louisville as a whole is sick and tired of being brought down by areas of Kentucky that border other fucked up states. For example, the Appalachian families with a blueish tint to their skin from generations of inbreeding are but a barefooted stroll away from West Virginia. And another horrible Kentucky embarrassment, Wynonna Judd, was raised near the Tennessee border.

So as far as the Creation Museum goes, it's not our fault! Like Pilate, we wash our hands of it.

How Powerful is Wiley S. Drake's God?

Wiley S. Drake, a pastor and a former national leader of the Southern Baptist Convention, called on his followers to pray for the deaths of two leaders of Americans United for Separation of Church and State.

In the 1990's, his seemingly ineffectual God failed to end both Gay Day at Disney World and 2 Live Crew.

I would suggest that if Joe Conn and Jeremy Leaming, whom Mr. Drake calls the "enemies of God" are alive in 3 days time, than Mr. Drake and his followers switch their allegiance to a more effective god (perhaps Ba'al, or Cthulu) and petition their new good to slay their former weak God.

Postmodern Preaching

First of all, there exists a Christian YouTube. It's called GodTube.

Secondly, there exists on GodTube a video of God speaking through a guy talking to another dude through whom Gene Simmons is speaking. And I'm watching it on TV at work, but really it's my boss watching through me. And so are you!

Holy Eggplant!

God's existence is finally proven beyond a shadow of a doubt. The ultra faithful should start pooling their material goods for the upcoming eBay auction, where the shining truth is sold to the highest bidder. Hallefallujah!

I knew "God Hates Fags" but now "Church Hates Fags"?

From the Houston Chronicle:

A megachurch canceled a memorial service for a Navy veteran 24 hours before it was to start because the deceased was gay.

Officials at the nondenominational High Point Church knew that Cecil Howard Sinclair was gay when they offered to host his service, said his sister, Kathleen Wright. But after his obituary listed his life partner as one of his survivors, she said, it was called off.

Read the rest of the article here.

Love your brother. Just not with lube.

Louis CK learns about the Catholic Church

A candid look into the ancient multinational organization.

video here

What is your dangerous idea?

Every year Edge poses a question meant to stimulate rational thinkers in the empirical world. In 2006 Steven Pinker suggested "What is your dangerous idea?", not dangerous because it's an ultimate weapon or a diabolical theory, dangerous because it may be true - or it might cause you to ask a difficult question.

Charles Seife suggested that nothing can be more dangerous than nothing, Susan Blackmore asked if everything might in fact be pointless. Habitual controversy magnet Richard Dawkins on the subject of eugenics asks "what is the moral difference between breeding for musical ability and forcing a child to take music lessons"

I'm beguiled by dangerous ideas, I love to watch a stand-up comedian who is pushing the boundary of what the audience regards as acceptable. It's delicious when they tell a joke that excedes the boundary but is so funny that everybody laughs before they've had a chance to filter it as 'unacceptable content' it's a very piquant laugh that leaves the audience complicit in the 'crime'.

What's your dangerous idea? Or would you like to guess which one of the following I may believe today...

• A vote is not a right, it should be earned
  
  
• Some countries would benefit from benevolent colonialism
  
  
• Fans of celebrity/talent shows should be sterilised
  
  
• The smarter you are, the less happy you'll be